I've been able to deal with the physical symptoms of my disease, even though I get frustrated because my mind thinks I'm 30 so it makes contracts my body cannot deliver. However, in this past week we have had an abundance of company, which I tried to escape from by retreating to my studio, which was not a solution according to my wife.
Quite often I found myself saying, "I really don't care", which is contrary to my nice guy image. Last night my wife and I had an intense fellowship meeting that opened my eyes to something I read regarding Parkinson's non-physical symptoms.
Most people associate Parkinson's with physical impairments, which is the visible or motor symptoms of the disease. The problem is people do not understand the mental aspects of the disease. Because Parkinson's is a neurological disorder within the brain it affects me mentally. Personality changes are more difficult to deal with because they creep up and alter my mood, which in turn solicits a response from those around me. Just last night I realize I have Apathy. In otherwards, "I don't give a damn".
I discovered in my journey through life that one cannot alter an issue until they recognize there is an issue. Mental problems are difficult on both sides of personal relationships and the only way to get through them is understanding where they came from.
I'm working on a painting that captures my escape from reality.
Until next time